PLEASE NOTE ****
👉The topic of In-laws is one that needs to be focused on alot more. Far too many people are miserable because of it. Far too many marriages have broken because of it. Far too little is openly said about it. It is reaching a crisis situation and it is said the darkest places in hell are reserved for those that remain silent in times of moral crisis.
So please brothers and sisters read and share. Forward to as many people as possible. Help as many people as possible and if all else fails PRAY. Pray for all the married couples in the world. May Allah create mawaddah and rahmah in their hearts for each other. A healthy marriage is a healthy home with healthy children. The children that are the next generation of this beloved ummah!
✔To all the Married Brothers out there: Do not let your parents or siblings, especially your mother and sisters, run or ruin your marriage.
✔Before you got married your sisters enjoyed a temporary privileged closeness and access to you and that was alright.
âś”Now that you’re married your wife takes priority over everyone including your sisters, regardless of how close they’ve been to you.
âś”Your sisters must respect your marriage and your wife’s position, and you must protect and defend your wife’s position, dignity and respect by prioritizing her above your sisters. Everyone in the family needs to respect her privacy and personal space. They can no longer walk in and out of your room as before. They can no longer expect you to be there for them as before.
âś”You are her protector and maintainer. It is your duty to protect her from all harm – physical and emotional. You are duty bound to protect her honour and dignity at all times.
✔You and wife are one. Never make decisions alone with your siblings or sisters without involving your wife.
✔Maintain a balance between your wife and your family members.
đź’˘It is incumbent to learn all your duties and responsibilities before marriage.
Many men go into marriage knowing nothing except what they have seen around them. Many a time he is surrounded only by unislamic cultural practices where the wife is brought in with her only role being a slave of the family. This ignorance makes many men say things like “You are replaceable my mother and siblings are not” whenever the wife seeks to find comfort or protection from him. Being told such things only creates feelings of insecurity and animosity. You end up the loser by missing out on the immense love and intimacy only a wife is able to provide as an insecure woman will be too afraid to love or commit to you fully.
đź’˘Ask yourself – how would you feel if your father told your mother she was replaceable?
👉 Sisters & Mothers: Please respect your brother and son is now a married man. Understand he has rights and responsibilities over another person now. You cannot expect him to have the same amount of time for you as he did before. You cannot have discussions or make decisions with him alone anymore. He is no longer alone but one of a pair.
👉Mothers and sisters : You helped your son/brother get married. You helped bring another familys prized posession into his life. They have entrusted him with their amanat. Help him to fulfill that trust.
👉Remember your son is not really yours!